Do it afraid
When life got really hard and scary as a new wife and young mother, I wish someone had told me to “Do it afraid” sooner. No, let’s take that back even before that. I actually wish my mom or dad had not just told me that it’s okay to make mistakes way back when. That mistakes were not bad but that it’s good to make mistakes. That mistakes are just how we learn and grow. To show me, by their own lives, that adults are adults by making decisions, and being accountable for both the good and the not so good outcomes. If Mom and Dad did anything wrong, it was that they didn’t let me see them make mistakes and how they dealt with the fallout.
It’s not as though they didn’t support me in my growing years. I was an above average student but nothing that would put a spotlight on me. I was a Girl Scouts all the way through school and I got First Class badge at the end. I had guitar lessons. My grandmother, a professional concert pianist, tried to teach me piano. I took vocal lessons… Never stayed with anything long enough to get really good though. Maybe it was laziness? Maybe it was scary when I had to get in front of others? Not sure at this point.
I was afraid to make those mistakes because somehow I assumed I was the only person who was so naive. Why do we do that?? Why do we think everyone else is smarter or got things all figured out? I can totally relate to the character, Mia, in The Princess Diaries movie. I was good at being invisible.
I have no traumatic incidents that twisted me up one way or other. It’s just that somehow somewhere I got the idea that making mistakes was a “bad thing”.
Never did I get the feeling from anyone that making mistake is how we learn and grow. I still ask the question, what scared me so much that I decided to hide from the world way back on the brink of adulthood? But even so, whatever it was the scared me, I needed a PUSH to do it afraid!! Freakin’ do it!! Do it and cry and fall and try and get up and… just DO IT!
Now that I know better, I am “preaching it” to my own kids and anyone else who might benefit from my new found wisdom.
Do it till you ‘get it’. Do it when it seems others are laughing. I had to explore that question for myself. Over time, there were more and more answers that needed questioning; so-called pearls of wisdom that needed testing.
Do it afraid!